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The Five Things We Cannot Change

And the Happiness We Find by Embracing Them

“A lucid, thought-provoking, and illuminating” guide to finding fulfillment and “fluid acceptance of life as it is” (Martha Beck, life coach and New York Times–bestselling author)
 
Why is it that, despite our best efforts, many of us remain fundamentally unhappy and unfulfilled in our lives? In this provocative and inspiring book, David Richo distills thirty years of experience as a therapist to explain the underlying roots of unhappiness—and the surprising secret to finding freedom and fulfillment.

There are certain facts of life that we cannot change—the unavoidable “givens” of human existence: (1) everything changes and ends, (2) things do not always go according to plan, (3) life is not always fair, (4) pain is a part of life, and (5) people are not loving and loyal all the time. Richo shows us that by dropping our deep-seated resistance to these givens, we can find liberation and discover the true richness that life has to offer.
 
Blending Western psychology and Eastern spirituality, and including practical exercises, Richo shows us how to open up to our lives—including what is frightening, painful, or disappointing—and discover our greatest gifts.
"A lucid, thought-provoking, and illuminating book about the realities of human existence—a wonderfully useful guide to fluid acceptance of life as it is."—Martha Beck, author of Finding Your Own North Star and The Joy Diet

"I started highlighting splendid passages in this book and my highlighter ran dry. The whole book is splendid."—Brother David Steindl-Rast
David Richo, PhD, is a psychotherapist, teacher, writer, and workshop leader whose work emphasizes the benefits of mindfulness and loving-kindness in personal growth and emotional well-being. He is the author of numerous books, including How to Be an Adult in Relationships and The Five Things We Cannot Change. He lives in Santa Barbara and San Francisco, California.

About

“A lucid, thought-provoking, and illuminating” guide to finding fulfillment and “fluid acceptance of life as it is” (Martha Beck, life coach and New York Times–bestselling author)
 
Why is it that, despite our best efforts, many of us remain fundamentally unhappy and unfulfilled in our lives? In this provocative and inspiring book, David Richo distills thirty years of experience as a therapist to explain the underlying roots of unhappiness—and the surprising secret to finding freedom and fulfillment.

There are certain facts of life that we cannot change—the unavoidable “givens” of human existence: (1) everything changes and ends, (2) things do not always go according to plan, (3) life is not always fair, (4) pain is a part of life, and (5) people are not loving and loyal all the time. Richo shows us that by dropping our deep-seated resistance to these givens, we can find liberation and discover the true richness that life has to offer.
 
Blending Western psychology and Eastern spirituality, and including practical exercises, Richo shows us how to open up to our lives—including what is frightening, painful, or disappointing—and discover our greatest gifts.

Praise

"A lucid, thought-provoking, and illuminating book about the realities of human existence—a wonderfully useful guide to fluid acceptance of life as it is."—Martha Beck, author of Finding Your Own North Star and The Joy Diet

"I started highlighting splendid passages in this book and my highlighter ran dry. The whole book is splendid."—Brother David Steindl-Rast

Author

David Richo, PhD, is a psychotherapist, teacher, writer, and workshop leader whose work emphasizes the benefits of mindfulness and loving-kindness in personal growth and emotional well-being. He is the author of numerous books, including How to Be an Adult in Relationships and The Five Things We Cannot Change. He lives in Santa Barbara and San Francisco, California.