Download high-resolution image

Perfectly Queer

Facing Big Fears, Living Hard Truths, and Loving Myself Fully Out of the Closet

Author Jillian Abby

Paperback

$22.99 US

Hay House | Hay House LLC

5.5"W x 8.5"H x 0.73"D | 11 oz | 24 per carton

On sale Apr 25, 2023 | 288 Pages | 978-1-4019-7074-1

Add to cart Add to list Exam Copies

This humorous, heartwarming memoir follows a wife and mother's journey of self-discovery and acceptance as she comes out as a lesbian in her late 30s.

Jill had a happy, healthy 20-year relationship with her college sweetheart, two wonderful kids, and rescue cat from the Humane Society. They lived in a nice suburban home with a white picket fence and owned a small bar that was rated one of the “Best Mom & Pop” businesses in Tampa Bay. From the outside, everything looked perfect.

Perfectly Queer takes the reader on Jillian Abby's poignant and painfully funny rollercoaster of self-discovery as she identifies and eventually accepts herself as a lesbian just before her 40th birthday. Living her new truth means leaving behind a life that, by societal standards, is nearly perfect.

This is a story for anyone who is hiding a piece of themselves and wants to know if it’s safe to be revealed. It’s for the parent who must choose between their own happiness and the stability of their family, wondering if prioritizing themselves is selfish. It’s for the person potentially facing a major life upheaval filled with unknowns in the future who is seeking reassurance that everything will work out just fine. It’s a story of hope and inspiration to those who are starting or are in the middle of their journey, and an affirmation to those who have been through it to stand proudly on the other side.

A beautiful expression of truth. Jillian takes us on a riveting journey as she shares intimate pieces of her heart and soul. Her words awaken the parts within all of us that need remembering and reclamation. A brave teaching memoir, this book cracked my heart wide open in the best way. It's a must-read for our times. - Asha Frost, best-selling author of You Are the Medicine

Perfectly Queer is not just about coming out, it's about coming alive. Jillian Abby bravely shares, with heart and humor, the love and freedom that's available when we acknowledge, accept, and amplify our truth. If you've been hiding and packaging yourself to be digestible to others, in any way, this book is for you! - Nancy Levin, author of The Art of Change and founder of Levin Life Coach Academy

Jill's story of longing for her truth and becoming the truest expression of her soul made me laugh, cry, and cheer! What a beautiful invitation for us all to live authentically and find the place of unconditional love within ourselves. I looooved it so much. Thank you, Chica, for your light in the world. - Sandra Hinojosa Ludwig, author of award-winning book Chica, Why Not?

In this perfectly honest and heartfelt memoir of what it means to wade through the Messy Middle stages of our lives, Jillian weaves a trail of laughter, tears, and 'me toos' that will resonate with any reader who feels caught in the gap between who they have been and who they desire to become. - Treisha Peterson, founder of the New June Academy and professor of human development and family studies at Texas Woman’s University

Perfectly Queer is the compelling story of one woman's journey of self-discovery that is at once unique and entirely relatable. For many, the hard truths Jillian bravely shares will be affirming, and for others this book will serve as inspiration. However rocky the road might be, Jillian's story shows us that living an authentic life is possible at any age and that love truly is love. - Madigan Likes to Read, popular online reviewer of LBGTQ+ books

Jillian Abby has mastered reinvention throughout her life to create the most whole and satisfying journey. She left the comfort of her hometown of Buffalo, NY, to study abroad in Cochabamba, Bolivia, at age 15. As an adult, her resume includes Certified Public Accountant, Licensed Massage Therapist, craft beer bar owner, creative copywriter, homeschooling parent, and black belt martial artist.

Her most recent role as a newly out lesbian and advocate for the LGBTQ+ community was by far her riskiest and most rewarding change. She serves as a committee member for Tampa’s first inclusive homeschool prom (@tbhip) and is a member of Tampa’s LGBT Chamber of Commerce and Babe Crafted. She supports others through her blog site QueerAbby.com and via TikTok at @AskQueerAbby.

Jillian lives in Tampa Bay with her partner, Jen, their wildly wacky children, Sophie and Ollie, and a rescue cat named Poe.